The "DL"

Disclaimer: This opinion of the "Downlow*" is based completely on the number of stories I have heard from people I know and knew and the vast amount of craigslist.ca casual encounters posts I have read, it comes from personal experiences (as a mostly straight girl) and does not in any way try to explain this group as a whole despite the blanket statements and run on sentences...

Straight guys on the "DL" get their cocks sucked by boys all the time, yet they claim they are straight, or "bi-curious". In most if not all the stories I've heard the first time a straight boy has one of these "encounters" it is with a male who is significantly (whether factual or relative) older than he is, the situation is somewhat seedy, or at the very least scandalous enough to become a secret (whether factual or relative) and it usually happens after a good amount of sex with girls, making the boys in their early to mid twenties and up.

It seems that this first encounter has a lot to do with who goes back for more and why. As we know people have sex for pleasure, not just families but that's not where the reasons people have sex stop. People have sex in anger ("hatefucking"**) there's resentful sex, sex to get back at other people, drug sex (pick your poison) and the list goes on and on, but one that comes up a lot, a really common one is "feel better about yourself fucking". When you have sex and someone makes you feel incredibly hot and out of their league it feels amazing, there's a certain satisfaction in it that nothing duplicates. When you're heading out of your prime or you aren't a movie star good looks person it feels amazing to fuck someone who feels privileged to service you.

Most gay guys I know find straight boys incredibly erotic, probably because they are the untouchables. The boys that gay guys know, no matter how good looking they are, they can never fuck. So when one of these so called "straight men" gives it a go it's a triumph for the man who "brought them over". This is probably what makes it so erotic to get them.

On the other hand the "heterosexuals" are both curious and knowing in this encounter. They are curious because it is simply human urge to wonder about things outside the norm in every situation (even if you detest it you had to wonder about it to come to that conclusion) and this includes sexuality, who can say they haven't had at least one homoerotic dream? They are knowing because they can sense the anticipation and the excitement in their partner (like anyone who is about to engage with someone who really wants it) and this spur’s them further, making it even more enticing than the initial curiosity.

These all spring from the same thing, both the straight and the gay man are given a boost to their self esteem. The heterosexual feeling more wanted than usual (specifically because in most heterosexual relationships this power is held by the female) and the homosexual feeling that he is so enticing he tempted someone who isn't usually attracted to his sex. I believe the DL has nothing to do with women***in any capacity, it's not that these men are no longer attracted to women but being with women doesn't give them the same boost of self esteem. They still go home or out and try to have sleep with the opposite sex but now and then they engage in this gratifying sex that has more to do with "feeling good about yourself" than anything else.****


*The Downlow or DL is when men who claim to live a heterosexual life participate in homosexual acts and keep it a secret (unless they get really drunk with a loose tongue and their most "open" friend)


**Ha ha ha


***well yeah, I guess that's obvious but I'm not just talking about the act.


****Unless they're gay...